Forgive us our debts,
as we forgive our debtors.
The
most frequent conversation I have around this petition is which word people
prefer: some like trespasses, some like sins, and some like debts. Let’s think
about them for a minute.
Trespass…
a trespass is occupying a space that one does not have the right to be. A
person who abuses another person physically or emotionally is clearly
trespassing… using and misusing space that is not theirs.
Sin…
a sin is an attempt at power, an effort to control a situation or another
person. Sinning might happen through trying to manipulate with words or power
or it might be a sneaky way of cutting corners or even gossiping. A shared
conversation about a person who is not in the room, which is not positive or
uplifting, is about feeling more powerful than them in the moment. That’s an
example of sin.
The
language of debts and debtors is clearly about a gap in a relationship. One
person owes the other person something or a group owes another group. It might
be reparations for past actions, it might be financial, or it might be an
effort to make up for a failure to act. A community’s efforts to exclude a
certain group of people or a city’s neglect of certain areas or locations might
be considered establishing a debt.
So
those are examples of how sins, trespasses, and debts works between people. How
do those things work between people and God? What are examples of how we
trespass, sin, or are indebted to God?
Trespass:
How do we occupy a space that only God has a right to be? Where to we trample
in a space that should belong to God?
Sin:
What are our attempts at power that should belong to God? How do we attempt to
usurp authority that should only belong to God?
Debts:
What do we owe God? What debt is there between God and us that we cannot cover?
When
we talk about forgiveness, we tend to either discuss how grateful we are for
God’s forgiveness or we talk about how other people need to forgive or what we
might not be able to forgive. We rarely talk about how hard it is to actually
forgive someone. We rarely talk about the effects of not forgiving. We hardly
mention the mental and emotional and physical toll of holding onto how we have
been trespassed, sinned against, and the debts that others have incurred.
What
can sin do? Sin can affect our self-perception. It can make us feel ashamed and
insecure. We feel uncertain. We are assured of God’s love, but our ability to
experience it seems dampened and frustrated.
Sin
builds barriers. Even if we are in a safe place, holding on to the sins that
have been committed to us keeps us from being able to fully engage with and
experience relationships with other people around us. We cannot trust them-
because if we do… they might hurt us in the same way.
Sin
makes us feel weak. When we are angry, it’s not actually a powerful feeling. We
feel frustrated and powerless. We feel ineffective and hurt. We might like a
good rant or vent, but ultimately, as long as we focus on what’s been done to
us, we have no power. In fact, we are giving the power to the person or group
that has hurt us.
Forgiveness,
on the other hand, centers us in who God is, breaks down barriers, and
empowers. When God forgives, it is the essence of who God is. God’s self is
revealed to be merciful and loving. When God forgives, barrier- real and
perceived, come down. We are reminded that nothing can come between God and
God’s love for all creation through Jesus Christ. That love is made real
through grace and through the Spirit- gifts and manifestations of forgiveness.
God
is in control and forgiveness is the revelation of that control. God is not
momentarily distracted by anger or revenge. God laments, but brings things
around to growth and renewal through forgiving sins, trespasses, and debts. Our
attempts at control, our efforts to play God, the obligations we cannot cover…
God’s forgiveness heals these things.
When
we forgive, healing occurs as well. We can be centered in who God has made us
to be. We are able to be in relationship with others. You feel empowered. If I
don’t forgive the person who hurts me… they can continue to hurt me. They have
the power, even if they are miles away… by not forgiving them… the trespass or
sin or debt… I am controlled by an event and a person who is not myself and is
not my God. I have no freedom. I am managed by something outside myself… and
that spirals out quickly, as most of us know.
Forgiveness
is hard, but if we don’t do it… if we don’t actually do the work of letting go,
of mending where possible, of distancing if necessary, of regaining our center
in Christ, of being led by the Holy Spirit instead of a spirit of anger or
revenge or victimization… if we don’t do the work of forgiveness, how can we
truly begin to trust and rejoice in God’s forgiveness of our sins? If we are
holding onto to slights and blows, historical sins and anticipated future
trespasses… how can we faithfully live in the hope that God can bring good out
of all things. If we do not do the work of forgiveness, what is the framework
we have for doing anything else that God has called us to do?
Frederick
Buechner, a Presbyterian pastor and theologian, said:
Of the Seven Deadly Sins, anger is possibly the most fun. To lick your wounds, to smack your lips over grievances long past, to roll over your tongue the prospect of bitter confrontations still to come, to savor to the last toothsome morsel both the pain you are given and the pain you are giving back–in many ways it is a feast fit for a king.The chief drawback is that what you are wolfing down is yourself.The skeleton at the feast is you.[1]
There
is a feast to which we are called… not just invited, but called… a feast that
is the food of forgiveness of ourselves and others. To taste of that feast is
to taste of God… not a foretaste of the feast to come… but of meal that already
is… juicy, abundant, sweet, filling, comforting, and nourishing… forgiveness.
Amen.
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